Noise from the Silence

OK, so I admit that I have neglected this blog for a while.   Mostly it has been that we have been incredibly busy.   Late spring headed into summer brought with it a whole host of activities and events that took up a lot of our time.   Lisa had her Senior Prom and she was radiant and beautiful and it was like a dream for us and for her.   She wore a Wisteria colored satin gown and I made her a bracelet of Swarovski crystals.

Not long after, we celebrated Lisa's 18th birthday with a party in our home.  It was magical to watch her at the party, knowing that all those people had come to celebrate her because they loved her and believed in her.  She was joyous in ways we had not seen before and the party was fantastic.   I baked her a lemon buttermilk cake with strawberry filling and Nicole decorated it with a fondant owl and flowers in some of Lisa's favorite colors.

The next two weeks were the last days of school.  Lisa had struggled so much during her senior year.   Not only did she start a new and very different school several weeks into the first quarter of her senior year, but she had not been prepared in her previous schooling to have enough credits to graduate at the end of a typical senior year.   She had been passed along, year after year, by "teachers" who didn't really care if she learned anything or not.  And since she was a foster child, no one took responsibility for what would happen to her if she didn't meet the requirements and graduate high school.  Everyone knew that when Lisa reached the end of her senior year and turned 18, they could wash their hands of her, turn her loose on her own, wish her good luck and walk away.   We had spent the entire year trying to make sure that none of that happened.  She was carrying a full load of classes during the school day and then working on courses on the computer at home after school to get all of her requirements in so she could graduate with her classes.

 It got close.....VERY close.   In the last few weeks of school, Lisa was on virtual shut down in the house, not allowed to do any other activities until her school work was completed.   She was skating a very thin line between completing the work and pulling off the GPA required by the state to receive a diploma.

Let me say this about Lisa, so you don't get the wrong impression about her.    She didn't have a low GPA because there is anything wrong with her intellect.   She is a smart and capable student.   Lisa struggled with depression for years and was told over and over that she would never amount to anything.  She spent time daydreaming; not an uncommon thing with kids in foster care.  She was unmotivated because no one was invested in her enough for her to want to perform for them and she didn't consider herself worthy of the effort.   She was passed from basic to intermediate courses without a thorough knowledge of the basic materials.   You get the picture.

Literally, the day before Lisa was scheduled to walk with her class in the graduation ceremony we got the phone call from her counselor that she had fulfilled all of her requirements and she was clear to receive her diploma.   We were elated. Lisa cried when she got the news.   She said she never thought it would happen.    Everyone had told her she would never make it.

Let me tell you that kid STRUTTED down the aisle in her cap and gown and then FLOATED across the stage to get her diploma.   We were so proud, so overcome with joy and relief!  Just a few days later, Lisa told us that she had contacted the local community college and made an appointment to take her college placement test.   WHAT??? OUR LITTLE LISA?   ALL ON HER OWN??????   All of the sudden she possessed this air of confidence and a drive we had never seen in her before.

She took her test, got her results, selected a course of study in elementary education, came home and set up an appointment to go to orientation.   She came home from orientation registered for school and scheduled for all of her classes.   We wondered to ourselves, "Who is THIS child, where did she come from and what has she done with Lisa?"

A few days later, Lisa was scheduled for an interview to start a volunteer position at a local nursing home and then she was off working that position.   She was riding the bus home from her "job" every day.  She was making a life for herself and learning independent skills.

Our baby was growing up!

Mid June brings my birthday, and this year we took a mini vacation at a bed and breakfast a couple of hours from our home.   The B&B was a stone's throw from one of the only foster parents Lisa had ever had that was kind and loving to her.   Perrie had to relinquish care of Lisa when she found herself having to move out of county for work, but she had kept in touch with Lisa over the internet for years.   She and Lisa had not seen each other in about six years, so they were very anxious to catch back up.   We were thrilled to be able to reconnect Lisa with one of the few happy parts of her childhood.  

Lisa approached us cautiously and asked us if would bother us if she called Perrie "mom".   She had always referred to her that way.   We had no objection whatsoever.   We were just glad that someone had been there to fill that place for her at some point in her childhood and we felt nothing less than sincere gratitude to Perrie for the part she played in Lisa's life.

Meeting her (and her daughter, who Lisa had always considered a little sister), was fantastic.    Perrie is very much like us and we all got along famously.   The little vacation was nice and very refreshing and it was hard to come back home to our work a day lives.

July came and we found ourselves suddenly able to move on some projects we had been planning around the house for some time.   We re-floored, painted and redecorated our living room and den, did major yard renovations and planted almost 100 new plants in 5 planting beds and several planters.    We lay down four truck-fulls of mulch and 120 feet of edging. We resurfaced our kitchen counters and installed a new sink and faucet set and a new kitchen light fixture.   Let's just say that July was a busy, sweaty and very fulfilling month and that it came and went so fast we could hardly keep up!

August brought a visit from our daughter Tara who lives in Michigan.   She and her boyfriend came to stay for a few days and we grilled and swam and shopped and went to the zoo and had family portraits taken.   In the meantime, Lisa got a part time, temporary job at the bookstore at the college she will attend.   She has loved having a job and the experience has been good for her.   She has had to learn to manage her schedule and her transportation.   She has learned to ride the bus in all kinds of weather and to get up VERY early in the morning so she can catch the bus to work.

Next Monday she starts college.   How did THAT happen?

A few days ago, she looked at me and said, "Mom, do you realize that in four years you are going to watch me graduate from COLLEGE?"

From your lips to God's ears, my love.  I believe in you!